[Pagan Agony Auntie] E is for Erzulie

If you have a burning question that you want my input on, feel free to drop me a line at corvaxgirl [at] gmail [dottie] com and I will keep you anonymous and dazzle you with my insight.  Or not. Whatev. As always, you’re the captain of your own ship and feel free to disagree with me as often and loudly as you like! 

A reader asks, How do you work with Ezruli Freda? Is it quite difficult to form a relationship with her?

It’s not hard, generally speaking, to form a relationship with Her if She wants a relationship with you.  She’s generally looking for new devotees but does but not every spirit/deity is into every practioner.  I can’t get St. Expedite to like me to save my life for example.  I could bring Him rum and pound cake six times a day and He still doesn’t want anything to do with me.  I haven’t done anything “wrong”, he’s just not that into me.  It happens in your spiritual life just like it happens in your dating life.

But.  Here’s the big catch in my opinion with Erzulie – you need to be experienced enough with working with deities and spirits to be able to draw clear boundaries.  Take an honest inventory of your skill set here.  I mean, if you’re bent on this, you’re going to do it anyway but I feel I’m doing my part by at least giving you the heads up.  She’s high maintenance and v. demanding and wants your life to be all about Her if at all possible.  She will ride you to the ground if you let her.  I consider myself reasonably experienced and She has ridden me like a pony.  Think “Whatever Lola Wants”.   With me, she wanted to go shopping one day for new clothes for me.  Fun right?  Not when it’s three hours later and you’ve tried on almost the entire store and you have a condition that makes this hard on your body.  We weren’t done until She said we were done and I bought what She said we were buying.  I bought the ticket and I took the ride but after that, I was a lot firmer with my boundaries with Her. 

If you feel like you can be firm enough with her, she likes everything pink and girly and froufrou.  Champagne, french pasteries, good lipstick, good perfume (She’ll accept small sample vials), mirrors, etc.  She’s a lot more “grabby” than a lot of other gods.  She likes to literally touch everyone and everything in her area, so think about that when you’re thinking where to put Her.  She was v. specific about who She wanted to “sit” next to on my altar and demanded to be formally introduced to the rest of the deities on the altar.  No other spirit/deity has ever really asked for that but the other spirits/deities on my altar space didn’t really seem put off by the formal introduction.

Deborah Castellano
Deborah Castellano's book Glamour Magic: The Witchcraft Revolution to Get What You Want is available for purchase through Amazon, Llewellyn and Barnes and Noble.
Her frequently updated catalogue of published work is available on Author Central.

She writes about Glamour Magic here at Charmed, I'm Sure. Her podcast appearances are available here.

Her craft shop, The Mermaid & The Crow specializes in old-world style workshop from 100% local, sustainable sources featuring tempting small batch ritual oils and hand-spun hand-dyed yarn in luxe fibers and more!

In a previous life, Deborah founded the first Neo-Victorian/Steampunk convention, SalonCon which received rave reviews from con-goers and interviews from the New York Times and MTV.

She resides in New Jersey with her husband, Jow and their cat, Max II. She has a terrible reality television habit she can't shake and likes St. Germain liquor, record players and typewriters.  

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