So, okay. Gail and I proofed the book, like, a million times. Then I proofed the cover with Emma about a thousand times. And then I re-proofed the cover *and* the fucking book another eleventybillion times as recently as this morning, nearly making me late to pick up little O. at the bus stop because I had to start running the CreateSpace proofer-thingie (THIS IS SCIENCE. DO NOT FUCK WITH ME) after the proof got sent back to me at 10:30a this morning. I was trying to finish it pre-work so it would hopefully come back to me post work. And it did. And I was all, YAAAAAAAAY! LET’S GET THIS FUCKING EMPIRE STARTED, PARTY PEOPLE! And I clicked the button. Maybe tomorrow it would show up, I figured.
Instead I got a polite email saying it would take 5-7 business days to show up on Amazon. FIVE. TO. SEVEN. FUCKING. BUSINESS. DAYS.
Bitches, I fucking proofed everything using *your* tech! A bunch of times! I super super proofed it for formatting errors. 5-7 days for what? PRINT, GODDAMNIT, PRINT!
Yes, okay. Logically, I know from previous publishing experiences that the publishing world usually moves at the rate of a speeding glacier (3-6 months if you’re really lucky) and that this is really pretty quick. But I’ve been busting my ass on this book for the last year and I want to see some action!
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooow. </Veruca Salt>
I need a chocolate peanut butter cupcake from Trader Joe’s, stat.